Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Three Cups of Tea

The book Richardson is reading which evidently convinces Christians not to hate Muslims. I had it recommended to me this morning....for other reasons I'm sure. So I am passing the recommendation along to all of you as well...also for reasons other than me thinking y'all hate Muslims...same as me...the un-Muslim hater.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Friday, September 25, 2009

Coalitis News in 3 Seconds...

Blah, Budget, blah, Bike lanes, blah, Blue cross....

and then THIS:

Follow the Richardson Coalition on Twitter! - @RCoalition

and it gets even better, thanks to Ken....

ChuckE Tweets Too! @CEisemann

To my brilliant friend David...



Check out his latest blog at Just my 2 Cents Worth.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Ooooh Yipee!

Hi, Destiny-

Richardson Chamber (RichardsonCoC) is now following your tweets on Twitter.

What should I twitter?

Click below for the link...

ELNA CHRISTOPHER SAYS SHE IS NOT "ED COGNOSKI"

Contributed by Tom Pauken

Sun, Nov 19, 2006, 01:07 AM
Elna Christopher called me to say that she is not using the phony name of Ed Cognoski to post comments on this site
and references on his or her separate site. Both Christopher and Cognoski share virtually identical views on a wide range
of views ranging from their social liberal positions on many issues to their strong opposition to any reform of the appraisal
system in Texas that would allow voter approval when local governments substantially increase spending through higher
property taxes. Cognoski refuses to say who he or she actually is although he (or she) is quick to find fault with the Dallas
Blog when it doesn't take the prevalent point of view on social issues that is in the mainstream media or when we post
articles the mainstream media tends to ignore. Of course, Cognoski could end the confusion as to who she (or he) really
is by simply using her or his real name. But, that individual refuses to do that. Perhaps, Ms. Christopher has an evil twin.
In any event, since Ms. Christopher (whose salary is paid by the taxpayers in her job as a media flack for the Texas
Association of Counties and who is a fierce opponent of the Governor's appraisal reform initiative) says she is not Ed
Cognoski, I have to take her at her word.
Dallasblog.com, the Dallas, Texas news blog and Dallas, Texas information source for the DFW Metroplex.

Monday, September 21, 2009

You All Voted For Nonsense So Hold On To Your Hats!

(btw, I'm aware ONE person voted against nonsense....probably Rex. Oh well R, blame it on Democracy)

Sorry it's been so long since I've posted. I promise I'm not pulling an Ed. It's just that our toilets are broken, well, not broken, but when you go to flush you have to hold the handle down for, like, the hole span of the flush and it's really been eating up a lot of my free time lately.

Well, that, and because I'm also a professional mall cookie cake maker these days. Proof, you say?

Wah-La:
Last year I spent $30 on one from the mall that said 'U R Old' and it sucked. This year I spent $3 on one from my kitchen, and it'll probably sucks way better!

Anyway, I won't be at the meeting tonight because I will be hand delivering this masterpiece to mi papa. Whoops, wrong D-Day. Here, this fella. Although, I must say, I like the first guys site better. Take note Mace! It doesn't get more patriotic than that!

Ok, so anyway, I won't be there tonight, but some things to watch for:

1.) Amir NOT stuffing his face like Takeru Kobayashi as soon as sun down hits.

2.) The flagrant use of laser pointers.

And 3.) hopefully, somebody asking Keffler about his 5 year contract, because I think all of us would appreciate a bit of clarification on this matter. I know I've said it before, but we will throw a parade for whoever asks first.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Satisfaction Survey...this'll only take a few minutes of your time ma'am.

So now that Ed has moved on (at least I think) I've done a lot of thinking about this blog. C&P was meant to balance out the crazy liberal slant he put on stuff, even though sometimes we still seemed to agree on things, and now that he's gone I feel like the fat kid on the end of an empty seesaw.

I've been thinking about my content for a while now. Everyone can agree that I'm hilariously funny, intelligent and clever, but everyone can probably also agree that this blog has blown for the past few weeks. Hey I'm conceited, not blind. And I think what has been happening is I've chosen quantity over quality. I figured that none of y'all probably really care about this city, you're all just using me to help you get through your day within the confines of a bland, boring cubicle. (ok, that was a joke....I think, hopefully you do all care about this city!) Anyway, I've put some pressure on myself to try and post something everyday even when there is nothing to post....kinda like the DMN. The difference is Jeff and Ian get paid to bore you, I do not. So I'm sure my stuff sucks even worse.

That being said I'll take a vote. Do you guys want me to post whenever something significant happens or comes to my attention, or should I just keep going with stuff like this? Your call.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

To Ed....


without you I would never have discovered this piece of my life...for that I am eternally grateful.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Awkward Moment Submissions-


C'mon, we all know what it was. But in fairness there were a few others.

Speaking of the Council's Free (Unsolicited) Sign Consultation....

Here's the finished product:

When I stopped by to take a picture of the sign the owner was outside and he told me how it's been working like a charm; already bringing in a ton of business.

I think The Murph hates Pentecostals

Scratch that, Murph likes Pentecostals Amir and Mitch don't. Booooo. And when did the council become consultants? I'm tired of them designing signs and landscaping churches. Other highlights, Bob Macy really dislikes the enviroment. REALLY. He just compared grass to concrete. WTF? But wait, he's vindicated himself by voting for the church. Let them build their stinking church!!!

In case y'all haven't noticed...

One of the strategies I use whenever I post something controversial is to hurry up and bury it under a lot of other mundane postings...just in case you thought my blog was "slipping again."

Now ya know.

Here, pictures take up space, right?

Sunday, September 13, 2009

As Chairman of the 'Keep Richardson Hip' Committee...

I was wikipedia-ing Richardson tonight, and WHOLLY GUACAMOLE! Who knew this???

"On January 8, 1991, Richardson High School student Jeremy Wade Delle fatally shot himself in front of his English class, an incident that inspired the Pearl Jam song "Jeremy."

That is so sad.

Here's the video:

Open Mic Night

I heard this visitor section at the council meeting tonight is going to be worth watching.

Dirty Carpet Bag'n Muslims

are not all that bad.

Had a long talk with a (real life) Muslim tonight and finally found some peace with the issue. Don't get me wrong, they're all still going to hell in my book, or according to my book rather, but I do not think they are all out to kill me or dominate America....mainly because of their poor organizational skills. The fact that none of the Mosques in Richardson even really network with one another surprises me. That is a really half@$$ way to take America by storm.

Bonus Points: Somebody find the actual text in the Qur'an that says we only get two chances and then it's off with our heads. I could probably Google it but I'm tired, and enjoying my reassurance while it lasts....

Does anybody else get these?


Wonderfully informative and scary, all at once...I highly recommend signing up.

{Below is for the Cottonwood Heights area. Always a lengthy read. Are there any others that give ours a run for the money?


****This is an automated message and the sending email address is not monitored.

Weekly Crime Tip: Have an alarm installed on your vehicle that has an audible alarm. Place stickers on the vehicle windows indicating it is alarmed. A visual indicator such as a flashing red light will also tell any potential burglar to stay away.

See who/what RPD is currently looking for at http://www.cor.net/PDInvestigations.aspx?id=10547

Certain offenses that occurred in Richardson may now be reported on-line for your convenience. To find out more information about on-line reporting or to file an on-line police report, go to: http://www.cor.net/Police.aspx?id=6988

For the current crime statistics, go to http://www.cor.net/WorkArea/showcontent.aspx?id=6028 and for historical information, go to http://www.cor.net/police.aspx?id=4580

The information below lists incidents added in the previous 7 day period. For more history, visit http://www.cor.net/police.aspx?id=4616

The following information is meant to give citizens a general overview of their area. It is not a comprehensive list. Some types of crimes (for example, those involving juvenile suspects or victims) have been omitted. Also, the crimes listed here are reported crimes. Their status may change if the investigating officer determines that the report was unfounded. For questions about your area of Richardson, please contact the crime prevention office, 972-744-4955.

Sector: 240H
-------------------

Date added online: 9/12/2009 2:04:08 AM
Date of incident: 9/10/2009 10:30:00 PM
IRA: 0800
UCR Code: 290
Offense Description: 290 DESTRUCTIVE/DAMAGE/VANDALISM OF PROPERTY
Block: 1000 of FRANCES WAY
Service Number: 09-087469

Date added online: 9/12/2009 2:05:34 AM
Date of incident: 9/10/2009 8:35:00 AM
IRA: 1600
UCR Code: 290
Offense Description: 290 DESTRUCTIVE/DAMAGE/VANDALISM OF PROPERTY
Block: 900 of S WATERVIEW DR
Service Number: 09-087183

Date added online: 9/9/2009 2:05:26 AM
Date of incident: 9/7/2009 10:45:00 PM
IRA: 0800
UCR Code: 120
Offense Description: 120 ROBBERY
Block: 800 of DUBLIN DR
Service Number: 09-086402

Date added online: 9/10/2009 2:05:13 AM
Date of incident: 9/7/2009 10:30:00 PM
IRA: 0810
UCR Code: 220
Offense Description: 220 BURGLARY/BREAKING AND ENTERING
Block: 100 of S COIT RD
Service Number: 09-086506

Date added online: 9/9/2009 2:05:23 AM
Date of incident: 9/5/2009 3:00:00 PM
IRA: 0800
UCR Code: 23G
Offense Description: BURGLARY MOTOR VEHICLE
Block: 1300 of REGAL
Service Number: 09-085851

Date added online: 9/9/2009 2:06:51 AM
Date of incident: 9/4/2009 8:40:00 AM
IRA: 1610
UCR Code: 220
Offense Description: 220 BURGLARY/BREAKING AND ENTERING
Block: 800 of W SPRING VALLEY RD
Service Number: 09-085223

Date added online: 9/9/2009 2:05:01 AM
Date of incident: 9/3/2009 10:00:00 PM
IRA: 0800
UCR Code: 23F
Offense Description: BURGLARY MOTOR VEHICLE
Block: 1400 of REGAL
Service Number: 09-085135

Date added online: 9/9/2009 2:05:23 AM
Date of incident: 8/27/2009 8:00:00 AM
IRA: 0800
UCR Code: 23G
Offense Description: BURGLARY MOTOR VEHICLE
Block: 800 of DUBLIN DR
Service Number: 09-085324

Friday, September 11, 2009

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Hot Post


(as in stolen - from Trey)

Not only is this lady pretty, she's smart. Richardson, use this letter as a template please, and make the necessary adjustments.

Mrs.Hunt has bigger hauvos than any of the MEN on our council.

In an attempt to bait Ed Cognoski into posting SOMETHING for the month of September, I give you, Tom Bache-Wiig's response to my Muslimayhem...

-with permission of course. Because who can resist dirty jokes AND theology lessons all wrapped into one?!?

(So go ahead Mr.Cognoski, rape/pillage, do whatever it is you do with Bache-Wiig fodder....you know you can't help yourself)

Destiny,

Amir loosens your lug nuts?! I hope it's still Abram that makes your wheels fly off.

Good, honest post. Couple comments:

1) As Christians, or Messianic Jews who believe that Jesus (Yeshua) is the Savior (Messiah), we don't have to pray five times a day, as Muslims are commanded to do. We're supposed to pray without ceasing. Of course, G-D is practical, and that command speaks to having a heart inclined toward the L-RD in all things ...a prayerful attitude at all times. I fail that, you do, all Christians do, hence the need we ALL have for a Savior/Messiah. We all (Muslims and Christians and “you name ‘em”) are very quick to point each others’ imperfections and hypocrisy. I often hear people say that Christians are not perfect, and are hypocritical – no kidding! What an insightful and incisive conclusion. That’s not to say that because that statement is true that we Christians somehow receive a “pass” for bad behavior (of which there is much, and I “own” my share). The truth in the statement just demonstrates the need we have for Jesus, and His sacrifice for ALL of us. When people say to me, “Aw, the church is just full of hypocrites!” My response is to ask where they think we should be. It’s like complaining about fat people being at the gym. Where would it better fit one’s expectations for “fat people” to be? The ice cream parlor? Burger King?

2) Islam is unapologetically extremely bold an aggressive about world domination. Christians, on the other hand, also want the entire world won for Christ. My personal opinion is that the overall tone and tactics of the two faiths, in securing this shared desire, is quite different (with good and bad apples on both sides).

3) I got to know Amir quite well during the campaign. There weren’t too many people I enjoyed being around more than him. He's a friend, but I, too, questioned his motives, and witnessed perfectly moral and legal tactics with which I didn't agree – ones that are just not cool in my book. However, we all made mistakes in the campaign (me getting less than 9% of the vote was the fundamental error under which all others probably fell for me! Jk).

4) Not voting for an Islamic believer because they're Islamic is not racist. Muslims do not constitute a race. Islam is found in every culture. Muslims are found in every demographic. If someone pulls the "race card" on someone else, using this argument, the first party is uninformed, or unskilled in debate. When this happens, I suggest reminding them that it is the one who "pulls the card first" (using race negatively in any manner) is the one who is displaying racism. Throwing out the word "racist" to get the upper hand in and argument/debate is sometimes called for, and sometimes not. We all must be discerning, calm, rational and thoughtful when this happens in a discussion or debate (unless one IS a racist, then, in my book, they've lost all credibility for social and political intercourse [the use of that unfortunate word is just for you, Dez, to keep the trend alive from the first sentence!). Not voting for someone because of their race or sex, is just plain stupid (and, yes, the proper term here is "sex", not "gender", as uncomfortable as that term is to use sometimes in this context - see the "lug nuts" comment above if your getting the vapors, Destiny).

5) I’m sure it was just a throw-away joking comment on your part, but Abraham of the Bible (Old Testament, or the “Tenach”) was not killing his son because he became a Christian. G-D asked Abraham to sacrifice his son for one purpose – to prove to Abraham himself, that he had the faith (not to mention chutzpah) to go through with it in obedience to G-D. G-D didn’t need to “find out” if Abraham had the faith…G-D’s omniscient. If G-D doesn’t already know stuff like that, them I gotta REALLY “rethink my thinking” on Him, you know?! Abraham had to plum the depths of his own faith and willingness to obey G-D, if he was really going to believe in himself enough to pull-off what G-D was asking – be the earthly father of G-D’s people! Ever said to yourself after succeeding at a particularly difficult task, “Wow, I can’t believe I accomplished that!” And from that comes the boldness to go the next thing, and so on.

6) Personally, I was never treated with more respect and genuine kindness than when I spoke at the Mosque here in Richardson. They are terrific people. But, as a believer in Christ, and, thereby a supporter of and believer in Israel, my personal inclination to vote for a Muslim is dimmed in the light of, at the very least, Islam’s questioning Israel’s position on what Israel considers its G-D given land (I am aware of the Islamic argument for the same case in its favor, too). Worse than that, at the very core many Muslims’ personal faith (possibly not all), is the question of Israel’s right to exist in any form. This conflict was first brought to light for me by Chuck Eisemann. Over coffee, way back in December, we had discussed my faith. His genuine response was to ask how I would be able to work and get along with a Muslim (…should one run and win). My answer then was in the affirmative – no problem, whatsoever. The Richardson City Council is never going to be voting on Israel’s or Palestine’s right to exist. We’re dealing with transfer stations, bad sidewalks and a perfectly good retaining wall behind a doctor’s office that’s scheduled to be replaced as a “thank you” for political endorsements and support. How would it be to work with Amir, had I made it onto the City Council? I would’ve loved every minute of it. Amir isn’t the one who made a big deal out of being a Muslim. I did witness / over-hear him cashing in a little of the “Muslim equity” when, on the campaign trail, he would run up to fellow Muslims to hand them his brochure, and say things like, “We’ve gotta stick together.” But, guess what. I tapped into a little of my own equity, and did that with Christians, too. Both Amir and I genuinely reached out to the Muslims, Christians and Jews alike in order to court their votes. I believe we found all of them to be very genuine people, who care about Richardson.

7) But decisions about who to vote for need to be reached after looking closely at one’s own core beliefs, and if they are compatible with the core beliefs (if you can ascertain them) of the one who seeks our vote. We should judge adherents to a faith by their actions. What has been done in the name if Islam, and what are Muslims willing to do to insure world domination? To what conclusion does the preponderance of evidence lead one to in answering this question? To be fair, let’s compare and contrast Jews’ and Christians’ motives and tactics toward the same end. If one’s choice for whom to vote is based on “likability” and personality alone, then that person is choosing poorly. They are making their decision in very murky, choppy waters, bobbing along without a rudder in the Sea of Subjectivity – but that’s how most of us choose, frankly.

Jesus was a Muslim?

According to wikipedia, anyone who believes in God is a Muslim. Oh, AAAAAAND you have to say the shahada.

Whew! Close call. For a minute there I thought I was going to have to put down my bacon.

Anyway, since Richardson recently elected its very first Muslim, I thought it would be an interesting topic to discuss on the blog.

Now, you all know that I like Amir, but I didn't vote for him. And I didn't vote for him because he is Muslim. Kind of racist of me I guess, but just being honest. I know very little about the Islamic faith and what I do know I've learned from Protestant pastors and ex-Muslims. All very scary and intense stuff. To me, you either have to be down with this religion or completely against it, there's not really a grey area of liking Islam. But according to Amir, there is.

So, I've compiled a list. Here is what I currently think I know about Islam:

*drumroll please*

They believe in the Old Testament.

They don't worship Jesus. (this is the deal breaker for me)


They pray five times a day, and it's very labor-intensive.

Muslims are commissioned by the Qur'an to kill all non-Muslims.....so maybe it was really Mr.Omar who loosened my lug nuts. *dun-dun-DUUUU!*

Cat Stevens converted after he almost drowned and God saved him.

Fundamentalist Muslims will kill their children if they convert to Christianity, although Amir said he'd be fine with his daughter becoming a Christian if that's what she chose to be, and that some extreme Christians have done the same thing. (Although, aside from Abraham I haven't really noticed that trend)

Muslim women wear burqas and sometimes set themselves on fire because of their abusive husbands and their oppression. (like I said, these are just the facts floating around in Destiny's head) *and by the way, not that anyone asked, but while we're on the subject, I kind of like the idea of burqas. Women shouldn't be forced to wear them, but I get the concept behind 'em, and being the proponent of modesty that I am, I think they are somewhat empowering. We should be able to choose what we skin we want to show or not show, and who's to say that all of these western women aren't really the ones who are being oppressed by this bleached out, silicone injected, starve to be thin society. Think of how much more comfortable many of us would be if our husbands were the only ones who saw our bodies and only our bodies, and when they did see some skin it was a special thing, not just a Tuesday trip to Walmart.

*steps off soapbox*

Plus, according to Amir, Muslim men are also called to be modest and he breaks the rules whenever he wears shorts. (I have noticed that the men love them some sandals though - Abrahm thinks men wearing sandals should be against the law here in America, with the penalty of a public stoning.)

Umm, let's see what else...

I've heard that Muslims prey on Christians because they are the easiest ones to convert.

Oh! Michael Jackson was one and had a whole Muslim posse called the nation of Islam. Pretty tough looking group.

Technically Muslim men aren't suppose to shake hands with women (another rule Amir breaks).

It makes me uneasy how this site puts evil in quotes here: "But Unlike some of the black sheep Historians we have taken a balanced approach and have also mentioned Great as well as some "Evil" Leaders like Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden." But maybe I'm just looking for something...

*reaching to the bottom of my Islam knowledge barrel*

Ummm, Paula Abdul is not one - She's Jewish.

Islam is very popular with black people, especially rappers, and boxers. (Proof: Busta Rhymes, Ice Cube, Muhammad Ali, Mike Tyson, Dave Chappell, Malcom X, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, & a couple of the Jackson's)

....so yeah, that's about all I got.

I guess in my humble reasoning, the negatives (honor killings) somewhat outweigh the positives (the Jackson's) and so I vote accordingly. I'm in desperate need of enlightenment and I'd like to hear from some readers. Preferably not the hateful and mean ones, but I'll take whatever I can get, because I do honestly believe that while many people disguise their disdain for Amir behind his carpet-baggerness, I bet some of it is derived from his Muslim faith as well. Just a guess though.

So Assalamu Alaikum! Now bring on the Anonymous posts!
(let 'em slide this time Bill)

{Disclaimer so that I can still get into heaven: Please don't allow this blog post to peak your interest and cause you to convert to Islam. Do not denounce Christ based on anything in it, or the comment section. And, um, if you are neither Muslim or Christian you should just know, Jesus is the tops.}

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

"Children laugh at President"

I bet it's because they're all racists.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

I signed it...

Remote Control

{This is actually from my personal blog, but since it's relevant here (...and a slow news week) I figured I'd post it on C&P too}

I have heard super-libs, hyper-cons, and unruly anarchists weigh in on the issue of Obama's student address, but so far I still feel like my thoughts have yet to be expressed fully.

I am a reformed hyper conservative, a thoroughly and thankfully brainwashed Christian, and a 26-year-old who's currently going though a nasty break up with my political status.

We just don't fit anymore, we've each changed so much and now we're growing apart. He doesn't know yet that I'm planning to leave, but I bet he can sense it. It's kind of the elephant in the room. (*Que rimshot)

That being said, at this point I consider myself an Independent. I am now among the proverbial chicken necks, turkey gizzards and pig snouts of this great country's political outcasts. We have nothing in common except for the fact that we now are all discounted. Unified only by our lack of unity.

So when I get a call from my still VERY RIGHT WINGED grandfather, telling me that Glenn told him Barack is going to be indoctrinating my kid, this is what I pictured...

In orderly classrooms, all across the nation our children are quietly studying their arithmetic when suddenly all of the television sets begin to flicker on in unison. The children snap to attention as the president hypnotically locks eye with the hope of tomorrow. (by the way in this fantasy, the TV's are all in black and white and the reception is dramatically grainy, very circa 1960)

Now I am reasonable, and I know it won't happen this way.

....becuase maybe it'll happen THIS way...

And I can't depend on some Hooters waitress to run into my kid's classroom and bash the screens up. Nor should I. That's not part of her job description.

I do, however, have to decide how Independent-leaning-Republican-ish I am these days. Do I pull my son out of school for the sake of making a statement? I know the president is not going to say anything bad or probably even vaguely liberal at this point. Not to mention the 24 year old teaching his classes is certainly brainwashing him better than I, or the president, can these days, and I've yet to stop her, right?

I'm becoming so lukewarm. And perhaps, I deserve to be spat out like the discount baloney I am.

Being extreme was exhilarating, even if I was arguing extremely stupid issues. I knew where I stood, what I thought, what my talking points were. Now though, now, everything is just grey....I've officially been over processed, and am now a spineless (although there are still chips of spine somewhere in me) political meat paste. how boring.

We're Back


...And no, my house did not get broken into by Chuck Eismann, because I told everyone on C&P that I was going to be out of town. Thanks for being concerned though.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Nothing to do with Richardson

...but I would just like to say, I don't hate this man. I get him. Heck, we might even be kinda kindred.We choose not to have a TV, so I admit I'm a bit behind on this story, but hearing it retold through the perspective of my husband was like watching a romantic comedy. I was moved, I laughed, I was torn, I was in love.

As someone who has been on both sides of this situation, I still feel the need to stand up for this older man, which says something. (ok, tie it back to Richardson Destiny, c'mon, you can do it) .......And I know for a fact Bob Macy has wanted to slap one of my kids before.

MUST SEE, MUST CLICK, MUST FIX

Booooo, it got deleted. Oh well, you can click here to see David's screen shot though....all we have left are memories now.

Crime syndicate - (at least) 7 people want this fixed!

John Murphy's a Baby

Or at least this is what I imagine he looked like as one....

Here's Bobby T....
Baby KefflerAnd lil' Chuck E....If you find some others, send them to me and I'll post them as well! conserveandprotect@gmail.com

C&P Drinking Game (Long Overdue)

Every time Barb says the word 'Carpetbagger,' take a shot.

Every time Bill McCalpin chastises someone for posting anonymously, take a shot.

Every time you read the word 'Chuckles,' 'Slagovich' or 'Car Allowance' take a shot.

And every time I write the word 'disclaimer' just go ahead and do a keg stand.

Perhaps then we'll all be able to know what we know about this town and still sleep at night...or pass out, rather.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Read This Or Else I'll Flag You

Click Here-> Trey took the words right out of my mouth.

I called my son's school about an hour ago and the school secretary said the first she'd heard of this was this morning and that the district still hasn't decided if they will air it or not.

'Las Charadas de un Corrupto el Gobierno' Production is Currently on Hold

Michelle Thames refuses to be impregnated with Rico's lovechild, we can't find a spandex mini-dress in Pam Schmidt's size, Bill said he's NOT going to shave off his little moo-stache (which is soooo 90's-novella, we keep telling him but he won't listen), and to top it all off, no one is willing to help me set city hall on fire, which was suppose to be the grand finale.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Hand Over The Crown, Mace....

And the award for Most Outstanding Awkward Moment of the Night last night goes to *drum roll, please* none other than yours truly!

So Bill McCalpin comes up to me last night and after we exchange pleasantries we start talking about all of the bad things that happen to 'Anti-RC-ers.' He makes a joke about my wheel falling off and I replied back that from here on out anything bad that happens to me I will blame on Chuck Eismann. That's when this gem comes falling out of my mouth, "What? A Yeast Infection? Darn you Chuck Eismannnnnnnnnn!"

Bill pretended like he didn't hear me. Classy move my friend. It didn't go unnoticed and I thank you.

That being said, the next person who's able to fit the words 'yeast infection' into a conversation with Bill McCalpin will get the honor of being the one to wash my mouth out with soap.

BREAKING NEWS: The Pot Calls The Kettle Black!

You guys are getting kind of ugly in some of these comments...

I'm all for clever humor (even though, I fully acknowledge, mine often times fall short of that) but some of these personal attacks about looks and what not, are making me rethink the 'anonymous comments' being turned on. Unless you're Brad Pitt (or Abrahm, of course), you're probably earning some pretty bad karma points with all of this ugly talk.

Just remember, you reap what you sow. So please, do as I say, not as I do. (:

And to all you kettles out there who are tired of my soul searching, and rules, and calls for decency...to you good sir or madame, I say suck it.

*sidenote-you guys don't even want to know the hours that I have to put in at the soup kitchen just to break even for this blog.

Bobby T. Can See!

He got a pricey new pair of peepers....now if only a particular rapist glasses wearing mayor of ours would follow suit.

Could you even imagine? What would we call him if Mayor Rapist Glasses was no longer applicable??? Please submit ideas below. Thank you.